Love the way you confronted that bully and supported his wife and daughter. Courage is when one’s words or actions support another’s wellbeing with no benefit to yourself. Very courageous! Interesting, in that infintisimal moment of choice, you choose to act rather than turn away. Proud Dad moment once again. Also quite happy he didn’t have a knife……
Rob, I love seeing your name in the comment section. It must bring you great joy to connect with and relate to your kids as adults. I’m looking forward to that too. CS Lewis said that courage was the greatest of all virtues because it is what is required when all the other virtues reach their breaking point.
Thanks for reading and for your comment, Dad. I love that definition of courage. Our human instinct certainly is interesting -- I take no personal credit for helping in that moment because it wasn't a decision I made. Like you said, in that infinitesimal moment I, for a reason I may never understand, acted to help rather than turn away.
Jack, I'm so glad you've followed your instinct to fall into the lap of your stories and share them. There is a kind of assertiveness in sharing oneself as a writer, confidence that your life experience has value, both to yourself and to others, that I think arises from the same protective instinct. There is a kind of fierce caretaking that shadows useful experiences and stands up for them by communicating them. That to me is the spirit of a storyteller, and you have it! I'm celebrating your recent shift to this focus as a creator. In my experience you're built for this.
"But the drawn-out legato tones that give Italian its recognizably romantic rhythm were replaced by Angry. Staccato. Bursts. Stabbing like ice picks at our groggy morning ears."
Rick, thanks so much for reading and for sharing with me the "spirit of a storyteller" -- I love your characterization of a writer that shares stories from their life. Those are the boots I am hoping to fill with each essay I publish. This shift feels good and I'm excited to keep exploring and unearthing myself each week, with you as one of my role models for what personal, honest, and engaging storytelling looks like.
It brings me so much joy that you highlighted that sentence as one that stood out for you. I was quite proud of how it turned out and your recognition means a lot :)
Jack - you did decide - just not in a recognizable, process orientated way. Our reactions are also micro decisions that reflect parts of our character, or perhaps an old, or a moment.
James - Yes, I am blessed to have two wise “old men” as sons. I am sure you have experienced this, but learning from your children is such a joy, a marvel. I have always, since they were babies, wished for independent, self-reliant, self aware kids, ones who would far outstrip their old man in thoughts, words and deeds. Both Tommy and Jack are evidence of my wishes. Have a wonderful weekend!
I love this: "Our reactions are also micro decisions that reflect parts of our character." So true.
Reminds me that of the saying that we don't rise to the occasion but we fall to the level of our preparation. How we decide to live each day will dictate our response in moments of chaos.
...i wonder if thought is instinct and action is communication and then thoughtless action something else entirely...the ability to find your way between this parts is notable and noble...to wave, be the wave, or swim amongst them...good on you for having good instinct and also mind...
Thanks for reading, Fis. I might rearrange those... I think thought is communication and action is instinct and thoughtless action is sometimes needed because thoughtful action would paralyze us in fear, panic, or something else. Appreciate you being here, pal.
Jack, you gave me a great privilege when you asked me to participate in the early drafts of this piece. I’m grateful you asked. It’s funny the 10%/90% question you asked. It was indeed 90% but that last 10% - oh, were they ever key ingredients. The story and the lesson were exquisite. Nice job pal.
The privilege was all mine, James. The more I write, the more I know it to be true that good writing is not an individual act. I wrote about ten drafts, maybe more, of this essay and not one of the solo drafts was better than those on which I received feedback from you. So, thank you.
The old adage that when you're 90% of the way to finishing a written work, you still have 50% to go seems to be true. Thank you for helping me land the last 10% that took this to the finish line. Makes me very happy the story and lesson landed and sat well with you.
Love this story, Jack—and also the analysis that follows. I do think we all have a protective instinct, but many people would've had a stronger fear/self-preservation instinct and stayed put. It's a great moment, incredibly well told. I like the humanity you bring to everyone involved, and more than anything, am so glad this ended without anyone getting hurt. Great stuff--I look forward to more.
Rob, thank you so much for reading and for this lovely comment. What shocked me most about the experience is how I reacted and what I was capable of in a moment of need. If you asked me the theoretical of what I would've done in that situation, I probably would have said "nothing" or "I don't know."
The lesson, to me, is that humans are incredible of doing amazing goodness. And we often don't know the bounds of our goodness because it takes a certain situation to pull it out of us... as you recently experienced in the story you shared in your most recent essay.
I'm very lucky that it ended as it did and the situation was never escalated thanks to some combination of luck and how I responded (which I like to think was calmly but assertively). Thanks for reading and being here, pal.
Love the way you confronted that bully and supported his wife and daughter. Courage is when one’s words or actions support another’s wellbeing with no benefit to yourself. Very courageous! Interesting, in that infintisimal moment of choice, you choose to act rather than turn away. Proud Dad moment once again. Also quite happy he didn’t have a knife……
Rob, I love seeing your name in the comment section. It must bring you great joy to connect with and relate to your kids as adults. I’m looking forward to that too. CS Lewis said that courage was the greatest of all virtues because it is what is required when all the other virtues reach their breaking point.
Thanks for reading and for your comment, Dad. I love that definition of courage. Our human instinct certainly is interesting -- I take no personal credit for helping in that moment because it wasn't a decision I made. Like you said, in that infinitesimal moment I, for a reason I may never understand, acted to help rather than turn away.
Jack, I'm so glad you've followed your instinct to fall into the lap of your stories and share them. There is a kind of assertiveness in sharing oneself as a writer, confidence that your life experience has value, both to yourself and to others, that I think arises from the same protective instinct. There is a kind of fierce caretaking that shadows useful experiences and stands up for them by communicating them. That to me is the spirit of a storyteller, and you have it! I'm celebrating your recent shift to this focus as a creator. In my experience you're built for this.
"But the drawn-out legato tones that give Italian its recognizably romantic rhythm were replaced by Angry. Staccato. Bursts. Stabbing like ice picks at our groggy morning ears."
Rick, thanks so much for reading and for sharing with me the "spirit of a storyteller" -- I love your characterization of a writer that shares stories from their life. Those are the boots I am hoping to fill with each essay I publish. This shift feels good and I'm excited to keep exploring and unearthing myself each week, with you as one of my role models for what personal, honest, and engaging storytelling looks like.
It brings me so much joy that you highlighted that sentence as one that stood out for you. I was quite proud of how it turned out and your recognition means a lot :)
sending more folks your way!
Jack - you did decide - just not in a recognizable, process orientated way. Our reactions are also micro decisions that reflect parts of our character, or perhaps an old, or a moment.
James - Yes, I am blessed to have two wise “old men” as sons. I am sure you have experienced this, but learning from your children is such a joy, a marvel. I have always, since they were babies, wished for independent, self-reliant, self aware kids, ones who would far outstrip their old man in thoughts, words and deeds. Both Tommy and Jack are evidence of my wishes. Have a wonderful weekend!
I love this: "Our reactions are also micro decisions that reflect parts of our character." So true.
Reminds me that of the saying that we don't rise to the occasion but we fall to the level of our preparation. How we decide to live each day will dictate our response in moments of chaos.
...i wonder if thought is instinct and action is communication and then thoughtless action something else entirely...the ability to find your way between this parts is notable and noble...to wave, be the wave, or swim amongst them...good on you for having good instinct and also mind...
Thanks for reading, Fis. I might rearrange those... I think thought is communication and action is instinct and thoughtless action is sometimes needed because thoughtful action would paralyze us in fear, panic, or something else. Appreciate you being here, pal.
Jack, you gave me a great privilege when you asked me to participate in the early drafts of this piece. I’m grateful you asked. It’s funny the 10%/90% question you asked. It was indeed 90% but that last 10% - oh, were they ever key ingredients. The story and the lesson were exquisite. Nice job pal.
The privilege was all mine, James. The more I write, the more I know it to be true that good writing is not an individual act. I wrote about ten drafts, maybe more, of this essay and not one of the solo drafts was better than those on which I received feedback from you. So, thank you.
The old adage that when you're 90% of the way to finishing a written work, you still have 50% to go seems to be true. Thank you for helping me land the last 10% that took this to the finish line. Makes me very happy the story and lesson landed and sat well with you.
Love this story, Jack—and also the analysis that follows. I do think we all have a protective instinct, but many people would've had a stronger fear/self-preservation instinct and stayed put. It's a great moment, incredibly well told. I like the humanity you bring to everyone involved, and more than anything, am so glad this ended without anyone getting hurt. Great stuff--I look forward to more.
Rob, thank you so much for reading and for this lovely comment. What shocked me most about the experience is how I reacted and what I was capable of in a moment of need. If you asked me the theoretical of what I would've done in that situation, I probably would have said "nothing" or "I don't know."
The lesson, to me, is that humans are incredible of doing amazing goodness. And we often don't know the bounds of our goodness because it takes a certain situation to pull it out of us... as you recently experienced in the story you shared in your most recent essay.
I'm very lucky that it ended as it did and the situation was never escalated thanks to some combination of luck and how I responded (which I like to think was calmly but assertively). Thanks for reading and being here, pal.